In case you are still around and wondering and its not obvious ... my house updates have slowed down; I still have one wall in the dining room to paint, a 4ft x 2ft section in the kitchen to paint, the stairway hallway, etc. I need to make a trip to an Ikea (4+hrs) to get the last bit of cabinetry, a pantry. The upper, open shelving needs to be put up and a chimney vent for the oven. It goes on, the list.
Perhaps my motivation slowed while I wait to hear about the work contract; perhaps its the lazy summer days where routine changes weekly.
What I have been able to do is watch the garden grow. YUM Snow peas. Hang with my kids - bike, swim, bike, soccer. And do some personal growth stuff.
Polka dot shirt, Forever 21
It's hard to make time for yourself when you are solo w/ kids. So during these past few months of "no work", I actually had one day of work a week. And I kept Lucy in day care for a 2nd day and made it a Me Day. A wonderful few months of not working; I look happier, feel carefree, and I have slimmed down. Thank you time. Time for running and biking. Time to lay on the couch and watch a movie in the middle of the day.
Feeling blah for the past couple years and wondering why I kept gaining (age?) I hadn't bought clothes for myself for several years. Sad. I like cute clothes. BUT now, feeling super fit, cute things actually look cute on! Amazing what running does for your thighs, butt, waist, arms, (my calves have always been fine ;) and .... mental state.
Red, slim chinos. A perfect deep red. Cute. Thank you.
Another thing I did to distract myself from the unknown, was buy tickets to Costa Rica. (Long in the planning, I just had to decide whether I should go ahead with it or not). I was there 20 years ago for three months and wanted to go back, take a look around and show my children the jungle.
So I just wanted to tell you I am still here, I bought a great travel outfit, and we are off for a week in the cloud forest and then a week on a pacific coast beach. And when I return, there will hopefully be good news on the contract, more painting and house updates and a travel post!
I love fall. And I have bought my first sweater for the season!
flecked sweater @ urbanoutfitters
That was unexpected and good for my ego. We had all gone out for dinner and then browsed the neighbourhood UrbanOutfitters. Usually I manage to glance at the clothes and check out the furnishings and home decor and get out the door with a bit of grace (not). Surprisingly last night, with three kids in tow, picking up jewellery, nailpolish and funny books, running rampant and tugging at my shirt to show my their sweet (and not so sweet) finds, I managed to spot a really comfortable looking sweater. I followed my gut feeling, pulled it over my head and tank top while walking towards the mirror and, WOW, it fit. And I looked OK. Before second guessing myself I purchased it. Something just for me.
I don't feel good about my body right now. I haven't for a while. I have, without explanation, gained weight, increased a few sizes and cannot shake it. Not sure if its because of my age (it happened suddenly in my early 40's) or a couple kids (I don't believe this); my eating has not really changed (or I am in denial); perhaps I am not able to walk as much as I used to (I used to walk a lot. a couple hours, everyday), but I do get exercise other ways ... I think I do???
I finally have come to terms that my younger shape that I donned for 20 years, without effort, may be in the past. Forever. (although I am still not getting rid of those 2 remaining rubber maid bins of smaller clothes. just in case). I haven't embraced my new size yet but I do want to get a couple of good fitting fall pieces. Not so slumpy, frumpy any more. No more tossing away adult size clothes in frustration and heading to the kids section to pick out a cute "little persons" item.
(secretly I haven't given up ... for now I have dropped that one table spoon of half & half and 1/2 teaspoon of raw sugar from my coffee and starting up yoga again).
Well, the fridge arrived yesterday. On schedule, although a few hours after the scheduled time slot (love the fridge, didn't realize the sides would be black. That's o.k.)
My living room is full, half of it.
But this is not about kitchen appliances, its about ME. Its about the four hours I had all to myself, in my own house, waiting for the fridge. 4 hours to do leisurely, whatever, whenever. A little bit of weeding, a little bit of cleaning, a little bit of organizing, a few buckets of pea gravel. I tried, again, to put the bike carrier onto the bike. Gave up. A few times. And then, realizing the delivery may not come at the beginning of the time slot, I aborted my other plans of going to fabric store, going for a jog, walking the dog and instead, I decided to embrace my time away from the office, forced to be at home. I kicked back and watched a movie.
Happy, Happy. Indeed. Nothing better then an afternoon matinee in your own living room. I decided I should take off 4 hours every week in the middle of the day; Maintain the house. Feed my soul.
It will be a few weeks, actually a month, before the floor goes in. Met contractor a few days ago. Took measurements for the radiant floor. Discussed a plan. Contractors main business is cutting grass and his fruit stand. Yes, he has a fruit stand! He uses Monday and Friday for other work. He is booked out for three weeks. Takes two weeks for the radiant floor to be ordered and delivered.
In the meantime, to keep me occupied, I've compiled a little list of other things to do:
~Update sleeping porch - curtains, rearrange furniture, move toys out, wash floor.
~Watch my tomatoes grow.
~Put cabinets together - which will fill up any unused space in the living room.
~Make a hair appointment.
~Collect all my picture frames, paint them black and display on mantel.
~Contemplate the benefits and satisfaction results of painting fireplace white. Again.
~Try again, to get that bike carrier onto bike. argh.
I come up with lots of home reno/deco ideas ... while I am at work.
And then, once home I'm either too tired, over extended, doing home stuff like cooking, little leagues, playing with my kids or just hanging (most likely).
I'm a Libra. And although Libra's are known to have a stylish eye (that is questionable), they are more known for their symbol, the scale. Well balanced. What few people may not know (unless, of course, you are one, married to one, off spring of one) is the scale & well balanced Libra does not mean even keeled, sailing along day to day, in the same mood.
Nope. Not at all. What well balance really means is lots of energy and motivation one week, tired the next week, pensive the following week, restless the following week, looking for ways to burn energy the following week...etc. Over the year we work out to well balanced, hopefully.
When I come up with an idea, fun. That in itself energizes me to start the project. BUT other times I need to wait until I have the energy to follow through with the idea. Sometimes that takes a while. Right now, I have tired of wallpaper scraping and pea gravel hauling. That kind of work would tire anyone, but I also fear that snow will come before I get re-motivated. And I need that pile of pea gravel MOVED before snow arrives. The other issue is I will tire myself wondering when I will re-energize so I can haul the rest of it away. And that energy, drained by wondering, can be used in a much more productive way such as starting a NEW project.
Yeah yeah, I could FORCE myself to do things. This past weekend was beautiful, but I was plagued with some sickness. And then Lucy sprained her ankle so I have been carrying her around, and then my mom was visiting and although we could have done it together, well, not much got done.
Before I come up with too many new ideas, I decided to hire someone to finish the pea hauling job. And maybe offer him the wallpaper scraping job too. And then I can get on with the finer points. And post some completed pictures! That is one of the fun parts of blogging. But now that the job offer is out and I am waiting his reply, this may be the butt kick I needed to finish one of those jobs myself. How do you stay motivated?
An early morning stroll through my garden,
Garden, ... I use that term loosely...
But it is my garden.
My long awaited for Cosmos bloomed.
One, tiny sweet bloom.
There are at least 6 hardy stems in this garden.
Mid-August and I wondered if I would ever get a flower.
Google told me my Cosmos needed so many hours of sun.
Alas, the bloom. And one is all I need.
I made my way over to the jungle of Elephant Ears (Amaranth) and Morning Glory.
Not a garden that appeals to everyone,
but I have grown fond of it,
it was determined to rise.
Started growing before I got to harvest it and plant the tomatoes.
Zooming in and mother nature doesn't fail
The Morning Glory entwining itself around anything
The tiny wisps of stem hair.
A bee and its destination,
Digging deep for his nectar
I returned inside and realized how good my feet felt.
Its been along time since I walked barefoot through grass.
Dewey grass.
Dew Drop Inn.
You get into habits, some of which are putting on shoes.
postscript: My (bluetooth) keyboard ran out of batteries... now I am at work and can add text.
Took off to a cottage. Rideau Lakes. I love a marsh. Paddle Paddle, Lilies, Lake weed. So blessed to have friends that included us in this beautiful summer moment.
A while ago I came across a scrumptious picture of caramels @ Blue. It was about time to take care of myself and a monthly treat of caramel seemed like the perfect gift to me.
I ordered the "Caramel Of The Month Club" from haveitconfections @ Etsy. My 2nd batch just arrived, Cloud 9. Half chocolate / Half caramel. It is delicious. My advise is, as soon as you receive the package of 2, cut the bars in half and store 3 pieces in the fridge and enjoy the 4th piece.
Of course, I didn't follow my advise. It is very difficult. I ate one entire piece before I managed to save the other one for another day.
While fixing up my home, I have discovered several things about myself. There are certain tasks I really, really enjoy doing and others I would rather hire out for. If I list them, would it be telling? Would some personality trait be revealed? Let us see.
Staining hardwood. LOVE. Down on knees with rag and bowl of stain. Dipping the rag in the glass serving dish (its the only thing I found laying around without a purpose, but I recommend it; the glass is heavy so it doesnt knock over, the opening is large enough to put hand and rag in...and stain in a glass....nice) Rubbing the stained rag over the newly sanded floors (badly sanded by a helper). Stroking the soaked stained rag evenly across the area. Making my way from one corner then across a bit, then down and filling in. Keep floating pet hairs off the wet stain is a bit of a challenge. I always thought I would enjoy owning a cedar type home that requires staining the planks every few years as an easy DIY maintenance, compared to clapboard and painting.
I enjoyed staining so much I will post two angles :).
But I won't say what happened to this foiled, hardwood floor refinishing job.
Scraping off wallpaper. LOVE. Weird, but true. Discovered this in my other home 331kensington when I did a quick update to the bathroom before putting the house up for sale. 2 things happened during that remodel. 1) I discovered scraping wallpaper off isnt as horrible as everyone claims. 2) I fell in love with a tool, the scraper. It has been with me every since and has performed many odd jobs.
That wallpaper in that bathroom slid off. The moisture made it easy. I think I did try some product to spray on some difficult spots. This time, in the vestibule, the quaint but old brittle wallpaper requires a bit more effort. It's dusty and little pieces are flying all over and although there seems to be just one layer of wall paper, its thick. So far I have not used a product...just my handy most favourite tool ever, the scraper.
My money is on this job,
the last started, the first to complete
Digging: LOVE, especially in the spring time. It usually starts small, with a small plan but then I keep digging and digging. And then I need to figure out what to do with the hole/area I dug.
Spring of 2011 impromptu digging;
which led to the idea of creating a stone patio; while I wait for the french doors leading to balcony.deck to be built
And Things I don't love but ...:
I would love to get more, make that ANY experience with electrical work. Upgrading exterior porch lights and interior lighting seems to be so accessible and easy and fun and a huge home improvement. Even if it is merely spray painting the old fixtures. Have spray can, will paint. But these fixtures need to come off and sometimes the wires are in the way of making an easy job more difficult. Electrical knowledge would be so useful.
My industrial light fixture for the dining room still sits in a box.
The old chandelier still tied back onto support.
Calling an electrician high on my list, I'm just not good at calling. Two pictures each, as I'm playing w/ whit balance
Painting, seems like something I would like, but I suck at it. And dread it. If the moons are aligned properly and I am in sync with my paintbrush and inner zen, I can manage painting.
Building a paver patio ... I do want to accomplish this goal, one time. I have dug out two areas in different homes. One dugout got snowed on and then the house was sold. The other one, the current one, well it just over grew with weeds while we were gone and now the ground is harder then the concrete slab that remains.
Yeah, I like details and repetition, meditative like tasks.
I used to plant trees in my twenties. For 5 years. Out in the wilderness.clear cuts of northern Ontario, Northern Alberta and all over British Columbia from the northwest side of Vancouver Island to BuffaloHead on the Alaskan border to the heart of B.C., Horsefly. One tree after another, all day long. 300 seedlings in my dual side bags, my shovel and steel toed boots. Down the rows I went (or mangles of brush). 1300 a day was a good day for me. $0.08 - $0.25 range a tree. That works out to 200,000 - 300,000 planted trees in my career.
I think these kind of tasks that I love, staining, scraping and digging come as no surprise as I am a retired tree planter which required similar traits; perseverance and accuracy and a bit of stubborness to get the job done.
Yea, forget about completing jobs, apparently I suck at that.
I love throwing on a pair of cut off sweat pants and a white t-shirt. Getting on my bike, pedaling hard, winding through traffic and zipping around corners, all the way to work. Biking along side cars, trucks and vans, respecting road rules. Yet, running stop signs and cutting corners when vehicles are distant. Breaking a sweat glow, tingling leg muscles.
And then at the office, changing into a comfy feminine summer dress and comfy shoes. Adrenaline rushing, energized.
It is about time I start looking after me; I have realized this for the past months. Sometimes it takes a while to get into action. Today was the day.
For mind & soul, ligaments & bones: some good ole gentle yoga. I am no good at doing this first thing in the morning at my home or last thing at night or anytime at home. I need a studio and yogi to lead me. So 15 months after my last appearance at the studio, I pack up my bag and mat, which had been sitting behind my work desk for the entire time and head out to lunch time yoga. I was a little (a lot) stiff and not so bendy; it brought back fond memories of when I was 9 months pregnant, laying on my mat, breathing in lavender and barely able to get back up. But I was much more flexible back then w/ 2 years of disciplined, as in I went every week, yoga. And the breathing and focus practice; thank goodness for that, as it was all the yoga breathing that helped me through my un-medicated labor and delivery. Seriously. My first birth, un-medicated as well, but a lot less smooth. I was hyperventilating, got really dizzy, "mom I'm gonna faint" mid pushing. Thankfully sergeant nurse brought me back to the task at hand. Afterwards, when it was my turn to shower, I did faint, flat on the floor. Ah, but I digress. Back to taking care of self, My lovely yoga studio is painted peacock blue (the inspiration for the room in my home that is now painted peacock blue) and lavender wafts through the air and right down my sinus, deep in to my belly. I got in there today for some gentle yoga, sweating and chanting. And a cup of spicy! artichoke soup from the vegan shop below the studio, aftewards. Now I am restored for the weekend and and ready to go weekly. Thank-you me for going.
For the sweet tooth: Good grief I cannot get this caramel out of my mind. I contacted the etsy maker and decided that I am worth it and getting a 3 mth membership. Thank you Brideblue. Seriously. We all need to treat ourselves.
For fun and self-esteem: Planning a mini road trip to White Mountains in N.H. for a trek up Mt. Washington. Researching campgrounds, preparing to go with my kids regardless of whether my brother & his girlfriend make it. Having their company would be great, but I don't want to be disappointed if they are a no show (he needs a passport, she will be 7mths pregnant - although its the passport that will be the stopper). Its a 4.1 mile hike up and the highest mountain in the northeast. Weather is known to be unpredictable. A bit of bouldering at the top. I did this 20 years ago. I was much younger, much better shape (spent summers tree planting) but really, really hungover and unprepared and not a climber. Too many tequila shots the night before with the misguided friend. No water bottle. I am much wiser now, but out of shape. And a baby on back? Is it possible? Why not!
For the work relationship: Hired another babysitter for Fridays. Which allows me three concentrated days at work now, and two un-concentrated days w/ baby. Bittersweet.
I am not a handy person. I am not surrounded by handy people now, nor did I grow up with Handy People. To be fair, my mom was a talented decorator, painter and, well, maybe the closest person I knew to being handy. She did complain that she wished her engineer husband was blessed with some handyman skills. My sister married a perfectly great handy man, diy'er, all round good guy. He is a kitchen installer by trade, but he often converts overstocked cabinets into T.V. consoles, decorative mirrors and other creative things. Hmmm and my brother also has a super handy girlfriend who can maneuver huge machinery, the kind of machinery that is plastered with cautionary signs, back up beeping sounds, back tires thicker then Giant Redwood tree trunks and taller then me. Helmets required. She also threw together stone steps and a path skillfully and superbly. Even being considerate of the standard step size so one doesn't get sued by postman/town. But they all live 4 hours away and although I get easily inspired and am full of ideas, the drive home kills it. And my lack of skills. And my lack of project-stamina.
I do like doing things. I like using my hands and creating. I like admiring a completed project. I do have a lot of ideas. And I am not completely useless around tools. Maybe afraid, afraid to use them to their potential. Sometimes it takes me awhile to get started on a project, even if it is entirely simple, as simple as hanging a shelf. Sometimes I just do not know where or how to start.
But a lot of times I do start, with lots of gusto - I can knowledgeably motor around Home Depot, Lowes, Ace and other hardware stores. I actually might look like a skillful & experienced diy'er. I can buy the stuff. And lug it home. And even get started. Sometimes I even take the time to prepare, things that I find boring like dusting the walls and laying down a torn sheet to catch the drips. Using the proper tools such as a level to guarantee a horizontal shelf.
But then something happens. Discouragement (I suck a cutting), time restraints (baby, boy, dinner) or merely stuck, tired, need a bath. Actually, the biggest culprit and projectdelayer is my lack of patience and focus.
Occasionally I finish a project ... a few months later during my next gust of an idea, energy and desire. And the enjoyment and pride of completing even the smallest and simplest task (hanging a picture on drywall!) is rewarding, rewarding enough that I continue to realize my ideas.
I have learned a few things:
~DO not paint in December. If you must, do not paint the room that the tree and all other festive gatherings will occur in.
~Returning to project a few months later is OK./Not finishing in a weekend is ok. Unless its a painting job and you have used painters tape. That stuff has to be pulled off within a 36 hour period of painting.
~Some things are not as daunting as they initially seem
~Have a talented and reliable handy-person on speed dial. Make her dinner and mulled wine.
~Discuss BIG projects with her and ask if your vision is bigger then the realization (gutting kitchen first then saving to do the rest HAHA)
~Try some things. Google it. Shall I attempt to replace chandelier or not. It seems like a simple task.
~Know your fuse box.
My recent project, floating shelves, started, discouraged, delayed, re-inspired and competed!
Here is a skill I admire. Knowing where the wooden supports are hidden behind the drywall. Handyman skill, thereby I completely lack. How is it when I NEED a 2x4 hidden board to hammer in a nail for a picture I cannot find one, BUT when I do not need one, such as pushing in a plastic drywall screw holder, I find not only ONE, but TWO. Yeah there are horizontal boards behind the drywall too. (Maybe its plaster, in my house)
Before Christmas, besides trying to paint a wall, not just one colour, but stripes. Yep, I am ambitious (and that project has been delayed). I tried a simpler thing, hanging a picture on the staircase landing. That folded quickly too. Wall too soft. Nail went straight in. Forget that. Move on.
I had another idea waiting to get started. I had bought some floating shelves for the nursery. Simple, inexpensive and not only makes the bare walls more appealing, it allows for much needed shoe storage. I even got my tool bag, a pencil, AND a level. All of it. The first shelf went up without too much problem. But it was semi-dangling off the screws. The perfectionist in me new it should/could be better. I wondered if it was the non-flat wall, or that I didn't get the plastic portion of the screw flat against the wall...whatever, says the lazy person in me. I was able to put a few things up and then wait it out until a knowledgeable person came by.
A few months later, wobbly shelf intact. I was ready to try the second shelf. That ended very quickly as I plunged the plastic screw holder into the wall and came up against a hard surface. Checked out the tip of the plastic thing and figured this one must not be as angular and sharp as the first shelf hardware. Discouraged. Project set aside. Wait it out until a knowledgeable person visits.
Two opportunities did arise; my very handy and skillful brother in law (whoa! that was back in November). He was the one that informed me I must have hit a ??? 2x4 board (I need to look up the proper name....he used it, but it escapes me). So I did learn some thing from him. And my contract-her has been by a few times (re: getting ready for kitchen demo, paint job, window replacement job). But I didn't bother to ask her.
Recently, last week in fact, I tried again. Got my handy level and pencil and screw driver. Actually, these tools had remained upstairs by the changing table in an empty diaper box. I knew where to find them if I had another project to work on. But I didn't start another project. I was determined to finish this type of thing. I needed the confidence and experience to move on to other shelf hanging projects.
So I moved my screw location a few inches to the left and baboom. Located another board. Ugh. "OK Sara", I encourage myself, "Don't give up. Try again." I persevere and move the shelf up a bit and try again. And that is all it took. The plastic screw holder eased in, as I remember happening with the first shelf. The screws went in easy enough, but this time I screwed them in a nano cm more then the first shelf screws. And that is all it took to resolve the wobbly type shelf. The 2nd one is much sturdier and snug against the wall and will surely hold the vignettes. I returned to the first shelf, made some adjustments and now I have my floating shelves.
So yes, there are two holes in my wall and yeah, I couldn't even hide them behind the floating shelf, but its done. They are sturdy and flat against the wall and properly vignetted up. And when I see the holes, I think, sure dry wall fill or wood fill will fix that. Ill fill 'em in sometime. Red paint. I can touch that up, eventually. If I wore nail polish, I could do the touch up right away.I have the wood fill, I don't have the colour. SO for now, when I am changing baby L. I glance up, admire the handy work and then look at the holes and laugh at myself and smile with contentment. Yay for persevering!
So that is a little intro about me and my lack of handyman skills, yet desire and determination to fix up my home. Simple things for some people, even simple for me, without the delays. Another tidbit about me, often I forget words, simple words for some, but words that get lost in brain and take a while to make it to the forefront again. So here is a little legend, thanks to google, I can easily learn the right terminology, but unless I use it over and over again, the words get lost.
Legend:
plastic screw holder things: wall anchors, plastic screw anchors (EYES WIDE OPEN, I wasn't too far off for this hardware)
2x4 invisible boards behind drywall, which is probably plaster in my case: STUD. (I almost gave up on that one. I was searching for something to put drywall on and got a lot of videos, which due to my lack of patience, I wasn't going to watch but BET the word would have eventually surfaced. Then I realized I need to search for something else to find that. Stud. So simple.
